Day 15

#currently_reading crazy sexy cancer diet book. 

Out with the Old and in with the New..Year

Wow! What a year huh?

As I reflect on the past year I have to say it has been arguably the most pivotal year of my life. This time last year I was shouting out that 2013 was going to be the most incredible year ever and boy was I right. This was the year I was turning 40... this was the year I was taking that dream vacation to Italy…this was the year I dared to be hopeful, actually expectant of an amazing year.

One of my favorite quotes is “if you ever want to hear God laugh make a plan”. Well, it must have been like a Chris Rock show up in heaven this year.

So you all know the story by now. And forever more my life, my body and all that I am will be described in time periods of  “pre-cancer” and “post-cancer” and I’m learning to be ok with that.

This year has been such an education on the absolute best and worst that life has to offer.  I have lost some friendships and been disappointed by many who I thought would be right by my side though it all. And while the lack of support from some have sadden me, broken my heart even, It has taught me to redefine what I consider a friend and I’m grateful for that. I realize that some people you have to love from afar, wishing them well as you close the door behind you.

The overflow of love has by far outweighed the disappointments. Work mates have become friends and friends have become family and perfect strangers have come along this journey with me softening the rocky road with prayers and well wishes.

I don’t know what the future holds for me in 2014 but I have resolved myself to not allow God to have too many more laughs at my expense.  I am instead trying to give up my expectations of what my life should be up to Him.  There is something very freeing in knowing that your highest priority in this world is to live your best life..TODAY, while being faithful that all the other details will be worked out for your greatest good.

This year has taught me about resilience and humility, about not only being stronger than I ever thought I could be but even more importantly accepting the grace that comes with being vulnerable , fragile even.

Resolutions? I guess the obvious one would be to remain cancer free this year and forevermore. I’m also going to try and be a better friend, mother, sister and daughter. I’d like to also be open to finding and receiving the love of my life this year and allow myself the audacity to stand firm in my beliefs, ask for what I want and deserve, dream bigger than before and for goodness sake take that trip to Italy.

I am setting my intention for a year of victory ahead. ..And so it is.

Wishing the same for you.

Love and Light

Asabi

Breast Cancer Awareness Hijacked My Favorite Month

**Heavy sigh**

I don’t even know what this means really but I don’t like it. It’s just two examples of pop culture jargon mashed together to what? Bring “awareness” to Breast Cancer “month”. First of all, I have no plans of keeping calm when it comes to having breast cancer and second of all, “Pink is not the new black”, it is not cute or trendy. It’s painful, its life changing and in a lot of cases life ending. We are half way through October, affectionately known as "Pinktober" aka Breast Cancer Awareness month and I thought I should give my opinion on it all.

It’s an odd time for me as October has always been my favorite month. It’s the month that the leaves begin to change (which I love!!!!), I can start layering my favorite fall clothes and most importantly it’s my birthday month. In fact, I’ll be 40 tomorrow…yikes! It was MY month until I had to now and forever more share it with cancer awareness. Not awesome.

I’ve read some great blogs from other cancer survivors and most are on the same page about the demeaning commercialization of “Pinktober”. A lot of businesses are making a quick buck off the backs and empty chests of breast cancer victims without giving any of those extra funds to charities that are actually helping the ones that need it the most.

Don’t get me wrong. I love that my friends are doing their part to support me and sometimes just wearing a ribbon pin or wearing something pink in solidarity makes me feel great because I know the intention is pure. Hell, my Dad even shaved his very full head of curls just to show his support. I’ve also had other friends who vowed to do the same if I had to go through chemo and thank God that wasn’t the case because some of them would not remotely look good with a bald head.

So how can you really help?

There are lots of legitimate places that you can donate to. Below is a link to Charity Navigator and they give a list of organizations that do their best to utilize their funds to directly help prevent and find a cure for breast cancer

http://www.charitynavigator.org/index.cfm?bay=content.view&cpid=497#.Ul2JHVBea8U

If the spirit moves you and you would like to donate to my own site which has been helping me keep afloat financially during my own battle please check out my “giving angels” tab which has a donation link. I would have not made it this far without the generosity of my friends, family, workmates and even strangers.

Lastly, I think the most important thing you can do to support Breast Cancer Awareness is to not forget about us come November 1 because we will continue to be in the battle regardless of whether or not Pink is still the color du jour.

Love and Light,

Asabi

I'm free bitches!

Wow. What a week. I’ve had the emotional sensations equivalent of being squashed like a bug. But like anything else you dust yourself off, keep your head up and add a lil more hair to the voodoo dolls. To clear my head I decided to take a much needed day off to visit with my fabulous cousin Lisa who was in town from NYC.

With only a couple hours to hang we went to lunch and caught up on our family, careers, men and the like. I’ve always admired Lisa, even as a little girl. I love that she travels to foreign countries by herself, has turned into this quintessential stylish but tough new yorker while still maintaining her L.A. joie de vivre and "valley gurl" accent.

On a whim we went to visit the African American Civil War museum on U Street and I’m so glad we did. Just so happen that this week was the 10th Anniversary Celebration of the Unveiling of the Spirit of Freedom Memorial, designed by sculptor, Ed Hamilton. It’s now a national monument located at 10th & U Streets, NW, Washington, DC. The memorial is also surrounded by a Wall of Honor which list the names of 209,145 troops who served in the “United States Colored Troops” during the Civil War.

We also checked out the museum a couple blocks away, located at 12th and U Street, and was met by the museum’s Curator and Assistant Director, Hari Jones. Mr. Jones was a passionate, engaging and articulate speaker. He spoke on the inaccuracies of what we all know as Juneteenth. The term is a contraction for June 19th, the date in 1865 when Major General Gordon Granger landed at Galveston, Texas, and announced that slavery in that former Confederate state had ended and that all African Americans were free. Despite the fact that Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation became official January 1, 1863. The popular belief was that African Americans not only did very little to ensure their own freedom but didn’t have the wherewithal to know they were actually freed until over two years later. The reality is that the Proclamation didn’t really free any slaves immediately but did in fact open the doors for over 200,000 black soldiers to join the military and help to courageously earn their own freedom.

In any case we learned a great deal yesterday about our history and each other and it made me feel so very grateful for the daily freedoms we all take for granted. It was a good day. I needed that.

Dumb-Ass Pussy

Another product of George Bush's “no child left behind” initiative???

According to the Washington Post Ol’ Georgie is very happy with the results of the latest National Assessment of Educational Progress Report. The assessment administered by the Education Department samples students in all 50 states and the District of Columbia in order to measure educational trends. This year the tests were given to more than 702,000 students.

According to the report, just in our nation’s capital alone, only 14 percent of fourth-graders and 8 percent of eighth-graders scored proficient or better in math. In reading, 14 percent of fourth-graders and 12 percent of eighth-graders were proficient or better. The fourth-grade proficiency rate was up from 11 percent in 2005, and the eighth-grade rate was unchanged. Yes, you read right!!... Only 8 percent of D.C. eighth graders are proficient in math and Bush says the results are “outstanding”??? But you must consider the source...

This is the same administration currently involved in a federal lawsuit challenging their rules on teacher credentials, saying they fail to ensure that all students have highly qualified teachers. According to the lawsuit, poor and minority students are more likely to be taught by teachers-in-training; in many cases, about 12% of poor students' teachers are interns.

Poor Kitty…Not only does he have to deal with the shame of illiteracy but now he has to die a slow painful death due to rabies.

Awwww…..