Happy Merry Christmahanukwanza!!!!

May you enjoy all the gifts of the season!!

Ashes and Snow

A man sinks through water as an elephant swims above him. A cheetah and a solemn young boy perch on a rock. A girl and an ape balance at the tip of a canoe, both reaching toward the still river. These images and others -- not one of them digitally composed or altered -- are the startling work of photographer Gregory Colbert.

Since its Venice premiere in 2002, "Ashes and Snow" has attracted more than a million visitors as it travels the world. Part of its brilliance comes from its permanent home within an impermanent structure, the Nomadic Museum, a portable gallery space designed to further immerse visitors in the world of Colbert's photos. As the New York Times notes, "The power of the images comes less from their formal beauty than from the way they envelop the viewer in their mood." Colbert considers "Ashes and Snow" a work in progress, and plans to develop his "21st-century bestiary" for years to come.

Beautiful.

Bah Humbug!!!

That about sums up my attitude towards christmas this year. I guess I am in one of my self- righteous "the true meaning of christmas has been lost in corporate greed and in the over commercialization of the holiday season " moods. While I love giving presents all through out the year I will usually go for broke every christmas surprising and delighting my friends and family with well thought out gifts.

This year I will be concentrating on the real meaning of christmas and in lieu of gifts I ask that you will instead accept my immeasurable love and gratitude. That has to be worth more than the Wonder Woman notepad holder/pencil cup I was going to get you. But, for those of you that insist on buying me something fabulous and have absolutely no idea what to get me I thought I would help you with a couple of suggestions:

1. A iPod Touch or Classic- The Touch has more bells and whistles but the Classic has more memory. I wont be mad at either one.

2. Cirque Du Soleil tickets- It's only in NYC till January 6th so you don't have much time.

3. Bath and Body Works products- I love the lotions, candles and even these amazing lip glosses..yum!

4. Amazon.com gift certificates- so I can download books and music on my new iPod.

5. A spa day or massage at my favorite local spa, Beauty, Bliss and Beyond.

6. Starbucks gift certificates- because I can never get enough soy chai.

7. Prescriptives Vibrant-C moisturizer and eye cream- because it's too expensive for me to buy myself.

8. Clinique Happy Perfume- to keep me happy!

9. See's Candies Old Fashion Fudge- to keep me even happier!

10. Target gift cards- self explanatory!


Of course, money is always appreciated. Happy gift giving!!!!

Ike Turner Dead at 76

Let's all bow our heads in a moment of silence.

Nam Myōhō Renge Kyō..

Nam Myōhō Renge Kyō..

Nam Myōhō Renge Kyō..

Monday Blues

I dont know about you but I hate Mondays. I always have. Today is no exception. It really doesnt help that I am sick and germy. I think someone gave me Mono. In any case I havent been 100% since I started my new gig (I'll talk about that soon) and now I'm down to about 58%. I spent the majority of the weekend holed up taking meds and watching netflix movies. So now it's Monday, I'm at work like the trooper that I am wishing I was in bed spooning.
:-(

Blame it on the rain

My friend Malik has been torturing me with crazy videos from Tay Zonday. Apparently he has been a You Tube phenom for months with over 10 million views spawning hilarious copy cat remixes and spoofs and even a spot on best week ever. I literally thought I would pop a blood vessel because he makes me laugh so hard. Please check out his interview with Jimmy Kimmel so you can hear him speak. Amazingly weird...I love it!!!

Crack is not so Whack

So says The United States Sentencing Commission. Crack cocaine offenders will receive shorter prison sentences under more lenient federal sentencing guidelines that went into effect last month.

Critics said it was unfair to apply longer sentences for crack cocaine than for similar substances, including powder cocaine. Under the current federal law, for example, the minimum sentence for possession of 5,000 grams of powder cocaine is 10 years, the same as the minimum sentence for 50 grams of crack cocaine. That wouldnt be such a issue except for the major racial deparity. Blacks make up more than 85 percent of federal crack convictions, according to the Sentencing Commission.

The good news is that the new guidelines are retroactive. So as many as 20k inmates will be able to apply for early release as soon as next year.

Hey Ladies...20k !!!!!!!!

Little Boy Blue

safely home.
from fighting a war that wasn't yours
from fighting people
with skin too closely
related
to our own

atone
atone
atone

we all must do
but sincerely,
i cant judge you
cause
really...
i fight for a
cause
all day long
i don't believe in

wars kill
but they also buy pink bows
and tonka trucks
puppy dogs
and baby dolls
war
is securing
the innocence
of your children
while assuring
the death
of yours

safely home.
i thank god
because the alternative
would be too much to bear
i wear
my heart on my sleeve for you
remembering you
my little boy blue
who loved apples
and kitty cats
and satin blankets
and me.

looking back
you were always a leader
youngest of 3
always mistaken
for the oldest of two
who knew
you would be a green beret at 23
who knew
my heart would swell
with pride
at the accomplishments made
from a war
I don't condone
but alone
you survived
a childhood that would have
devastated a lesser man

trade you bombs and bullets
for alcoholic mothers
and absentee fathers
i lived more than you remember
products of our parents
we could be
can both these apples
fall far from the tree?
i'll give you a medal
of honor
for trying
my little boy blue
safely home.

i love you

Crack is Whack

Who says there arent available single men out there???

Happy Thanxs Giving

This has been a whirlwind year for me seemingly filled with the lowest of lows. But I have also been so very blessed to have turned the proverbial corner and I am thankful and grateful for so many things. Here is a short list:

1. waking up.
2. wanting to wake up.
3. my brother returning home.
4. the support and love of my family (at least the ones I'm still talking to.)
5. my amazing sister-friends (Claudia, Kim, Ginger, Shelly, Angie, Heather, Sheila, Brandy, Cree, Tahisha, Ty, Dawn)
6. my new job (it's a means to a end)
7. the resurgence of creativity
8. closure.
9. the resilience of the human spirit.
10.craigslist.

I'm on Strike!!!

In solidarity with the Screen Writers Guild.
“No money? No downloads. No downloads? No peace.” -Tina Fey

will post soon.

Welcome Home !!

I am head over heels ecstatic that my baby brother Amon is finally home from his stint in Afghanistan. I couldn't be more proud of my Green Beret. We are blessed to have him home safe and sound and thank you all for your continued prayers for him and all of our soldiers fighting in lands far far away.
"De Oppresso Liber"
(To Free the Oppressed)

Autumn Leaves

I am in love.

With the autumn leaves.

I was beginning to think they were never going to come. But, alas! Today was the first day I felt OK to say fall was among us. I spent every available moment looking out the window and daydreaming. The rain is falling and the clouds are gray but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Cause right now all I need are the leaves.

I was tired of the "be happy cause the sun is out" summer days. They left me too exposed.

I'm at peace today. Even with the rain. I'm at peace. Even with the cold winds. I'm at peace. Even missing him as much as I do. I'm at peace. Because this too shall pass.

This song always reminds me that I am not alone in my sentiment.

We dont ALL leave

I want to pitch a tent
Light a fire
The glow of your distinction
Keeping me warm
Keeping me watchful
Of your daily miracles
You keep struggling, fighting, doubting,
Trying, surviving, being
Longing.
LOVING.
Not here to take advantage of,
Just discover you
Explore you
With pure intentions

Cause we don’t all leave

I realize the kindness of strangers
Is not always so kind
But can be more reassuring
Than the pangs and arrows of pseudo-friends
And quasi-lovers
People disappoint
God does not
Take solace with the
God in me
As I will in you
And maybe the loneliness won’t be so agonizing
And maybe the nights won’t seem so daunting

Cause we don’t all leave

I’ll help you bury
The monsters underneath your bed
And you can use your magic
And help me vanquish my demons
And maybe one day the silence won’t scream so loud
For the both of us
Until then
Distance and time will matter not
When your thoughts
Have a soft place to land
I invite you
To lay them with me
Without fear
As I remain by you
Silent
In quiet resolve
Just as a reminder...

That we don’t all leave

~asabi

Who looks more pissed off???

Disclaimer..this was totally Ginger's idea to post these pics and as much as I want to keep my self respect and dignity I have to admit it is funny as hell so here you go...be amused!!!

It's my party and i'll cry if I want to..

It’s exactly five minutes till the day AFTER my birthday.

I made it another year!

I didn’t die in some weird, tragic accident whereas everyone that heard about my untimely death would say “wow..isnt that ironic? She died on her birthday.”

And I didn’t slit my wrists.

Not that I would really slit my wrists. It’s just something about birthdays that depress the hell out of me.
There is a certain level of discontent that looms over me some years, and this just happens to be one of those years.

It’s not that I don’t feel loved. I had plenty of calls, emails and cards full of well wishes from family and loved ones. And while one particular loved one didn’t call I guess it was just another reminder that it’s time to move on.

And that’s a good thing right?
So why the sadness?
This uneasiness I feel?

Like most, I sometimes contemplate my purpose in life. I wonder if somewhere down the road to discovery I may have made some wrong turns. I may have chosen a path that is taking me further away from my “Personal Legend” as the book The Alchemist refers to it. The Alchemist is such a enlightening book and it teaches that each one of us has a goal in life, a dream, a wish and a reason to keep us going and it’s up to us to find out what that is.

Its not that I feel I haven’t accomplished much in life. I’ve accomplished plenty. I just think that maybe I’m not living the life I was meant to, or with the person I was meant to be with.

But with awareness comes hope.

And I am hopeful that my ultimate purpose in life will soon be revealed to me. I am also hopeful that I will have the courage to make the difficult decisions and painful choices that may come with getting closer to my “Personal Legend”.

Paul Coelho says “When you want something, the whole Universe conspires to help you realize your desire.”

I think that’s an amazing statement.

So what do I desire? Only my heart and the Universe know.

It’s after midnight now…

My birthday is now officially over and with it..my discontent.

It’s been replaced with a certain resolved acceptance for where I am presently and an inquisitive optimism for where I will be in the future.


And I guess that is the greatest gift of all.

100 Random Things About Me

1. I was born October 16, 1973.
2. My first name means “one of special birth”.
3. My middle name is Olaniye. It means “for the righteous I will bring wealth”.
4. I almost lost my leg in a car accident 10 years ago. It was broken in 15 different places.
5. I am both loner and social butterfly.
6. I am 5’4”.
7. I was born premature.
8. I use to be able to play the piano by ear.
9. I have partial hearing loss from listening to music with headphones.
10. I have two younger brothers.
11. Between them I have 5 nieces and 1 nephew. I love them dearly.
12. My blood type is O positive.
13. I have a form of sickle cell anemia.
14. I have crushes on Anderson Cooper and Jeffrey Wright.
15. I have a cousin that is a voodoo shaman. When I was born he performed a naming ceremony whereas your “ancestoral spirits” pick your name.
16. I auditioned for a part in the Blues Brothers movie when I was five. I didn’t get it because I cried instead of dancing.
17. I’m afraid of flying.
18. I’ve lived in 6 different states so far.
19. Before it’s all over I will have lived in a foreign country.
20. I was raised Catholic.
21. I doubt the existence of God more than I would like to.
22. I’m contemplating becoming a Buddhist.
23. I once had eight cats.
24. My biggest pet peeve about myself is my indecisiveness.
25. I watch too much TV.
26. I want Barack to win just so I can see Michelle kick ass as the first lady.
27. My favorite ice cream is rocky road.
28. My biggest pet peeve about other people is a lack of authenticity.
29. I make the best mac and cheese.
30. I have been arrested once.
31. I love the beach, I can watch the waves for hours and hours, but hate the sand.
32. One of my favorite places is Catalina Island.
33. I love playing badminton.
34. I wanted to be a fashion designer when I was little.
35. I was a avid gardener when I was young, now I kill cacti.
36. My first job was gift wrapping at Nordstroms.
37. I was force fed a avocado as a child, now I hate guacamole
38. I have never been married.
39. I have a teenage daughter.
40. I am afraid of spiders.
41. I cry every time I see The Color Purple.
42. I am double jointed in my legs.
43. I had a full scholarship to USC.
44. I have to sleep with the TV on. It keeps me from thinking.
45. I think smoking is stupid, but It does make certain people look cool.
46. Autumn is my favorite season.
47. I love Cherry Blossoms.
48. I would cry as a child if my mother put more than one food item on my plate at a time
49. I am a decedent of German immigrants, African slaves and American Indians.
50. I am most creative when I am sad.
51. I think certain good things happen for a reason to make up for the awful randomness of everyday life.
52. I love Chai tea
53. I think I’m more interested in having a wedding than getting married.
54. I think napping is underrated.
55. I am not a “morning person.”
56. I love Oprah.
57. I don’t trust anyone else’s driving.
58. I love seafood but eating crabs is the most frustrating endeavor.
59. I like sleeping during thunderstorms.
60. I use to sleep walk.
61. I like spooning.
62. I’ve been told my toes look like fingers.
63. I still believe true love exists. I’m still holding out for mine.
64. I think you should use any excuse to celebrate.
65. My dream destination is Tuscany, Italy.
66. I don’t have any tattoos.
67. I believe direct eye contact is extremely intimate. I tend to avoid it with strangers.
68. My dream job would be a songwriter.
69. I don’t have a favorite color.
70. Picasso’s “The Mistress” is my favorite painting.
71. Andrea Bocelli is one of my favorite artists.
72. I’ve always wanted to live in a Victorian house with a wrap around porch.
73. My favorite flower is the Sunflower.
74. I can spend hours in Target.
75. I love pumpkin anything.
76. My favorite day of the week is Saturday.
77. My great grandpa never called me by my name..he called me perch-mouth..he said i was perfect.
78. I’ve been accused of being flirty,
79. And a racist.
80. I believe in karma.
81. I can’t drive a stick.
82. My first pet was a German Shepard named Smokey.
83. I grew up on Kenwood Street on the south side of Chicago.
84. So my “porn name” is Smokey Kenwood.
85. I think having children for most is a selfish endeavor.
86. One goal is to have my writings published.
87. I’ve always believed I would win the lottery.
88. I love house/disco music.
89. Math scares me.
90. I drive a VW Jetta.
91. My dream car is a hybrid Range Rover.
92. I’m messy..but in an organized way.
93. I believe sarcasm is sexy.
94. I was listed as one of “Who’s Who Among American High School Students” for my academic achievements.
95. The first album I bought with my own money was AL.B.Sure’s In effect Mode.
96. I’m convinced all my gray hair is premature.
97. I Google everything and everybody.
98. I distrust anyone I can’t find on Google.
99. I can be intensely curious about people, which sometimes is mistaken for sexual interest.
100. I use to be a hopeless romantic, now I’m a hopeful realist.

What I'm feeling tonight..

It's a story of a boy who loves a girl and a girl that loves him even more. While he is far away, he tells her to maintain her strength like a willow tree. "Learn to bend so you wont break" he says. Seems simple. She knows better....

so as i stand here being your willow tree
inside i feel like a sapling
struggling..grappling
to make sense of everything
and maybe im not strong enough yet
to withstand all the changing that come with seasonal winds
its just that i dont want you to forget
me
when the day begins
just know
your seeds help me to grow
stronger everyday
and as hard as it is for me to blossom while being apart
i will be faithful in bending like the willow
as long as the wind doesnt break me
or my heart


~asabi

And it cleans your windows without streaks too!!

Blue alcohol is not for amateurs!
I'm not sure who invented Hypnotic or why it ended up in my cup last night but it did...it's dangerous, and I have the headache and cottonmouth to prove it.

I also have vague but fond memories of a fabulous time at Ginger and Emily's house party. From watching "Beat Street" in the back yard to stopping unnamed drunkards from trying to piss in the living room...it was a good time had by all!!

Here I am with one of the many cool people I met. It took me a whole day to recover, but it was fun! fun! fun!

Love Bites

And at the end of each new failed relationship I say this will be the last time!!! I'll just forgo all the headaches, disappointments and drama and get a cat. I guess this time the universe was listening….

Last week, Chyna went for a run and came back with a kitten.

A newly pregnant neighbor was looking to get rid of it and found a sucker in the form of a pet deprived child. Before I could get “oh hell to the naw!!!..” out of my mouth, she had a litany of reasons, promises, and pleadings flowing out of hers. I reminded her of the demise of her last kitten, Gypsy and how I had to give him away because she didn’t take care of him properly.

She reminded me that was over 3 years ago and that she "can’t show responsibility if I wont give her something to be responsible for" (imagine batting eyelashes and pouting lips). It was total bullshit but I gave her points for her efforts.

“But isn’t he adorable???” she kept saying…Of course he is….what kitten isn’t?? I just really didn’t want to deal with the potential mess, vet bills and scratched up furniture.

The neighbors were nice enough to send him with food and a litter box so I gave in and said we would keep him for one night, but he had to stay in her room and he was going back the next day. Chyna insisted on giving him a name but I would have no parts of it. Once you name it, you get attached and you’re less likely to give it away. I told her that’s how I ended up keeping her. She didn’t think it was funny.

So, one day turned into four days.. and by day five I was smitten. How could I not be? He IS the cutest kitten known to man. He does however derive great pleasure from playing evil ghost cat and jumping from various hiding places right onto your leg as you walk by.
He is a bad ass...but we love him.

So the kitty got a new home and finally a new name… Kaiser Soze
Chyna got a new pet and another chance to redeem herself and I got a much needed distraction and a reminder that love and joy comes in many forms.




“The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.” ~The Usual Suspects

Do You Know This Man?

He may look crazy but at least he is telling you upfront what is on his mind and every other place I might add. At least he isn't part of the cowardly, immature group of men that think it's OK to pull their wankers out in the middle of polite conversations.

Times can be really hard for a single gal nowadays. All we want is to meet nice guys and have a little fun. And in doing so we should be able to trust that if we accept an invitation for dinner, movies and the like that you do not misconstrue a general interest in you with a overwhelming desire to see your jack-n-the -box. Unwarranted exposure is never sexy. In fact, it's outright gross and creepy!!! Like some of you women out there, I also have been victim to this unfortunate occurrence...

Recently, a guy I dated (and I use that term loosely) over a year ago started calling, texting, emailing me out of the blue. We only went out a couple of times and it ended abruptly when I found out that between he and my ex-roommate somebody had a hankering for the other and a conversation ensued about breast size and what one would be willing to do to get one's computer fixed. It's a long story but let's just say her side was a little less plausible to believe. She moved out soon after and I stopped talking to him because in reality I just wasn't that in to him.

So fast forward a year later and A.A. is trying to "see me, reconnect with me, be just friends...since he knows I must have a man, as fine as I am" etc..etc..blah..blah blah... Truth is..I know he probably just broke up with a girlfriend and started going through his black book trying to see who may have forgotten just how weird he really is. For two weeks I gave him several legitimate excuses as to why I couldn't see him. Not that I was totally against catching up with an old "friend", I just wasn't willing to forgo other plans to do so. Just so happen he caught me one night on my way to one of my treks to U Street and after some guilt inducing tactics he got me to agree to stop by for a minute just to say hello. Now I bet if this was a movie you would be screaming at screen right now..."What a dumb ass...Girl!! Don't do it!... It's a setup!!" And in my defense I will say that I am a grown-ass woman and should be able to go to a grown-ass man's apartment (who I know) and expect him to use the 15 minutes I allotted to "catch up", see what he missed out on and send me on my way....

So he opens the door and offers me a nice friendly platonic hug. I accept and take a seat on the sofa. I comment on how big his new TV is and he comments on how pretty I remained. I thank him and try and change the subject. "How's work?" "How's the family?" " Oh..that's nice" "Oh yeah, I heard that movie was good"..etc.. So after literally four minutes of "catching up" he says " why are you so far away? sit a little closer" I tell him that I cant sit any closer because then I would be on his lap! We both chuckle. Then he asks if he could have a kiss. Oh damn! damn! damn! Why does he have to ruin a perfectly good moment by asking for something I have absolutely no desire to give? "We are just friends..remember?" I tell him. And as I am trying to reiterate my point by trying to move away he takes my face in both hands and plants the most god-awful tongue lashing of a kiss. By the time I was able to yank my head back half my face was wet.

Mistake #11,467 : I didn't smack the shyt out him and run for the door! Instead, I sat there wiping my face off, trying to remain calm. For a minute I think I was actually frozen to his cheap leather sofa. Frozen with the embarrassment of his audacity and my stupidity. So as I'm sitting there staring blankly at the TV, planning my escape, I must have zoned out cause I know he was talking but I was having a Charlie Brown moment and all I could hear was "wohmp wohmp..wohmp wohmp wohmp".

At this point I turned to tell him it was time for me to go and this nasty bastard had already unzipped his pants and was hand dancing with his p'nizzile!! His eyes were slightly rolled back in his head and my MAC Chili Red lipstick was smeared all over his high yellow face making him look like a crazed killer clown.

Of course I couldn't get out of there fast enough! Mind you he continued to pleasure himself as I tripped over his legs running for the door. He asked me why I was leaving so soon and I said "cause it's obvious that you need some time alone!" I could have sat there all night with the shyt I wanted to say but why bother? He obviously was a crazy fuck that somehow thought I would be aroused at just the mere look of his shrunken banana.

I realized it was just best that I made my exit as gracefully as possible. He did get up long enough to unlock the door and as he struggled to zip his pants up he looked me straight in my eye and says "well.....thanks for stopping by..it was good to see you" .......WTF!?!?! "um..yeah..ok..bye?" was all I could get out before I broke camp to my car. I looked at my watch and it was 7:35 pm...seven minutes later than the last time I sat in my car. That was all the time it took for him to make me feel like a altar boy after his weekly meetings with Father Thomas.

Now, you might want to chalk this sad story up to him being a horny nutcase and me being a dumb-ass but I'm sorry to say this is not a isolated incident. I've been told of similar scenarios by several women who are much smarter than I am. I'm just pleading with all the respectable men to spread the word to your creepy brethren to stop the madness and put your pocket snakes away. And you wonder why women think of you as critters. Frogs..snails..and puppy dog tails ...indeed

TGIF!

I had a very interesting night (which I will have to go into details later), but I did see two great up and coming artists and wanted to pass the word about Justin Trawick and the Roll Wit Us All Stars

Don't forget to support all the independent artists out there!!!

Dumb-Ass Pussy

Another product of George Bush's “no child left behind” initiative???

According to the Washington Post Ol’ Georgie is very happy with the results of the latest National Assessment of Educational Progress Report. The assessment administered by the Education Department samples students in all 50 states and the District of Columbia in order to measure educational trends. This year the tests were given to more than 702,000 students.

According to the report, just in our nation’s capital alone, only 14 percent of fourth-graders and 8 percent of eighth-graders scored proficient or better in math. In reading, 14 percent of fourth-graders and 12 percent of eighth-graders were proficient or better. The fourth-grade proficiency rate was up from 11 percent in 2005, and the eighth-grade rate was unchanged. Yes, you read right!!... Only 8 percent of D.C. eighth graders are proficient in math and Bush says the results are “outstanding”??? But you must consider the source...

This is the same administration currently involved in a federal lawsuit challenging their rules on teacher credentials, saying they fail to ensure that all students have highly qualified teachers. According to the lawsuit, poor and minority students are more likely to be taught by teachers-in-training; in many cases, about 12% of poor students' teachers are interns.

Poor Kitty…Not only does he have to deal with the shame of illiteracy but now he has to die a slow painful death due to rabies.

Awwww…..

Suga Making Sara

she was his ghost
yet she haunted me
more than he knew
“suga making” sara
left her mark
dancing sweeter
than any woman ought to

with a mesmerizing sway
her hips
liked to give way
to ancestral rhythms and beats
carried
by the spirits of African forefathers
buried
deep inside,
as if she was the field
where they died

not so far in the distant
memories
did evoke
a certain sadness
when he spoke
about the feather
in her flowing tresses
and the child
she chose not to birth
while my own labor bears
restlessness
with his blindness
to my worth

and as he did his dance
of remembrance
i could hear
faint footsteps of regret
as if he hadn't loved
like that since
but alas,
he seems to forget…

me.


~asabi

I'm Sorry

Tomorrow marks the observance of Yom Kippur, one of the holiest days in the Jewish calendar. It is a "Day of Atonement", a day set aside to "afflict the soul," a day to repent for the sins of the past year. In order to truly make amends with someone you must first seek reconciliation, and attempt to right the wrongs you committed against them.

So, in the spirit of atonement I'd like to sincerely apologize to those I've wronged this year. To the offended (and you know who you are) I say to you:

I'm sorry for not being patient enough
I'm sorry for ignoring your calls for months on end
I'm sorry for not supporting your choices
I'm sorry for allowing my problems to overshadow yours
I'm sorry for waiting 15 years to tell you the truth
I'm sorry for pretending to be interested in you
I'm sorry for being so far away and not doing enough about it
I'm sorry for forgetting your birthday
I'm sorry for not loving you for who you are

And while I'm here asking for your forgiveness, I realize I must wholeheartedly forgive those who have hurt me. To those offenders (and you know who you are) I say:

I forgive you for breaking my laptop
I forgive you for not being there when I needed you
I forgive you for mistaking assertiveness for bitchiness
I forgive you for stealing from me
I forgive you for talking shyt about me
I forgive you for taking advantage of me
I forgive you for forgetting my worth
I forgive you for breaking my heart



I hope I've inspired you to do some repenting of your own.

Shalom uv'racha

Because I'm feeling melancholy

today.. I wanted to hear something to make me feel better. This is one of my favorite songs. Beautiful lyrics sung by a beautiful man. It's equally sad and uplifting. The melody is haunting but feels like a well needed hug from beyond. Just close your eyes...listen...and... exhale....

Injustice...it's always in fashion

Don't forget to wear black on Thursday, 9/20 to show support for The Jena 6. I may not be able to go all the way down to Louisiana to protest but I can certainly show my solidarity by wearing black. I even bought a new dress for the occasion. Dr. King would be so proud.

Kids Today

So I spent my evening at "back to school" night at Chyna's school. It never ceases to amaze me just how grown kids are looking now-a-days. Especially the girls! Some of these chicks were looking like co-stars in a R.Kelly home video. It's just not right! On average, girls are maturing so much earlier then previous generations but experts don't always agree on the reasons why. Research dictates that possible reasons include global warming, growth hormones in the chicken and even watching too much television. But what ever the reasons are parents must be diligent in trying to do their part in slowing it down.

On a side note, I have anxiously been awaiting the new installment of America's Next Top Model. So don't bother calling me Wednesday night because Chyna and I will be glued to the tube, eating a bucket of chicken and popping holes in the ozone layer during the commercial breaks.

Worth Sharing..

You may need to read it a couple of times but it's worth it.


.. and here's more
When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions
May wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams
As the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you
So shall he crucify you.
Even as he is for your growth
So is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses
Your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and
Shake them in their clinging to the earth.

The Prophet by Gibran Kahlil Gibran

Welcome to the World!

Just wanted to send warm wishes and lots of love to my girl Brandy and her husband Etril on the birth of their beautiful new baby girl Jaylen! Born 9-13, she is the apple of her parents eyes. And if she is anything like her momma she will be kicking ass and taking names!



Congrats!!!

R.I.P.

Did anyone else remember that Tupac died 11 years ago today? Does anyone care? Well, it's a little known fact that Tupac is indeed my baby's daddy (can't you see the resemblance?).

RIP Tupac! He and his child support payments will be sorely missed.

Back in Business!!

I got a new crackberry y'all... after Craig and 'em stole ole' Charlie I was going through major text withdrawl. But, my new baby is here...bright and shinny and happy to be with his new mommy!!!

LOL

TLK2UL8R

; )

Happy Birthday Ikem!

Just wanted to take a moment to say happy b-day to one of my favorite people in the world..Ikem Yanan Murphy. And while we all know today is the 6th anniversary of "9-11", a day that changed us all forever. I'm choosing today to focus on celebrating a life of someone who will always be special to me.

Devil-1 Asabi-0

Funny thing happen on the way to church Sunday..I was jacked at the gas station!!!

After a great Saturday night out with the gang I was determined to get up early to go church regardless of the lack of sleep I got. I woke up late of course and hurried along knowing I still needed to stop for gas. So as I'm pulling into the station all I'm thinking about is.."hurry up..get the gas..can't be late!". Now, I'm the first to admit that I have on occasion left my car unlocked if I ran into the 7-11 and such but today was different....

I had a very odd feeling when I pulled into he gas station and made a point to roll my window up. I grabbed some cash (even though I had a check card in my purse) and left it and my phone on the seat. I hit my alarm when I got out the car but unfortunately, I wasn't paying attention to the fact that the car doors didn't actually lock. According to witness accounts, as soon as I walked in the gas station, three guys(that had been sitting there looking for a easy target) pulled right next to my car, one guy jumped out, opened the door and took my stuff. Before the witnesses could realize what had happen they pulled off. Not that they were going to do anything as the guy had a gun. So, I'm gone maybe 3 minutes, I come back totally oblivious to what has just transpired and as I'm trying to pump my gas one of the witnesses tells me what happens. I'm like WTF!!! The police are called and descriptions are given and promises are made to find them but I'm inconsolable. I just want to go home and cancel my cards and lay down. It's a very lonely feeling to need to reach out and tell someone what happened and you cant remember one damn number and all of your contacts are in your beloved crackberry that was just stolen!!!

In hindsight, I had a feeling something was going to happen and a good friend reminded me that there was a reason I was away from the car when they took the purse. If the door was locked they could have broken the glass or worse waited until I came back and took it by force. And while the aftermath is a hassle I'm blessed to be here. My mom says that was just the devil trying to stop me from going to church. I'm not so sure if I believe her, but if that's the case he may have won that battle.....but the war rages on.

BTW..if you see three nukkas in a silver lincoln continental with the tag number TLK256 will you let a sista know? thanks

To all my fans...

real life is interferring with my blogging time. Will post soon. In the meantime check out Charming Bum . It's a great blog and she has alot of time on her hands. :-)

Are you happy now?

So my daughter Chyna has been on my case about spending time with her friends parents. She has the crazy idea that I should automatically want to be friends with them because our children hang out. As I politely tried to explain you can not force friendships and people that I do call my friends are so because we share common experiences and we’ve bonded in some form or another. And, just because I do not want to go on a weekend trip to NYC with Kylie’s mom does not make me anti-social. It means that I know my limitations in interacting with certain human beings in certain settings and that situation would so throw me over the edge. Now, if it was Kylie’s dad I might reconsider. He is kind of hot in a Brian Kest yoga master tantric sex, vegan granola kind of way. But, I digress...

Anyway, Rita, a mother of one of Chyna’s buddies, tells me her motorcycle biker club (yes, I said motorcycle) is throwing a cabaret and she has an extra ticket. So to appease her and Chyna I decided to finally accept an invitation to hang out. I ask her what I should wear and she says “well it’s a typical cabaret, so…”. So….. that doesn’t help me since I have never been to a local cabaret and have no idea what to expect. Now, if you are part of the blissfully ignorant like me let me break it down. We are not talking the critically acclaimed play and movie, nor are we talking about this. In reality, or at least in the reality of local DC/B’more commoners a cabaret is a party that is usually thrown at a club, a boat or in the case of last night’s fiesta, an elk’s lodge in bumfuck Dundalk, Maryland. It's suppose to be for the "grown and sexy" and they make it seem exclusive by selling tickets ahead of time. Alot of times, it's BYOB and they usually have some bootleg food that may or may not be worth the $15-20 you shell out. So why do they call it a cabaret? I still dont know but I decide what the hell I'll go check it out. I throw on some heels, my cutest jeans and a sparkly pink top. I happily agreed to taking separate cars and following her up there. Forty-five minutes, a toll road and two high ass bridges later we arrive at the lodge. If it wasn’t for the 50 plus bikes parked side by side I may have missed the place. I take a deep breath and put my best “I’m happy to be here” face on….Showtime!!!

Rita, or “Smilee” (as her biker buddies called her), introduced me to the gang as we headed in. Everyone at our table was nice enough I guess. They said the obligatory hellos but didn’t pay too much attention to me after that. Well except “Brutus” who made it a point to buy my drinks and tell me how nice my hair looked even though it wasn’t a weave. A little while later things really got going when the D.J. played “Lean wit It, Rock wit It” and every biker boy and biker chick got out on the dance floor while I happily sat bopping my head and warming my seat declining dance offers. Don’t get me wrong I can get it crunked with the best of them but I just think after the age of 25 there are certain dances you should not attempt to do. See what I mean???
The best part of the night was when they took a “pause for a cause” to not only remember all their fallen biker comrades but to give out "Trophies" of Smirnoff and Bacardi to individual biker clubs for certain achievements.:

Club who has the most members’ rep’n ..Ruff Ryders
Club who came earliest ..Ghost Town Riders
Club who traveled the farthest…N2 Deep

Um hello..I drove 45 minutes…can I get a bottle of Boone’s or some’n???

Oh well, I lasted a whole 2 hours and thought it was time to take my siddity ass back over the bridge. I said my good byes to my new biker “friends” and promised to take a picture at the next event. I did however get a souvenir of the event in the form of a ticket on my way home from a nice Dundalk police officer for a broken tail light. Actually, it was probably just a reminder from the universe to not be so judgmental, but whatever.

So, contrary to Chyna’s beliefs I am not “mean” or “stubborn” or the least bit “anti-social”. I showed her that I can pretend to fit anywhere and if it ends with a smile on her face regardless of how many cranberry and vodkas it took then damn... it was all worth it!!!

Thinking of you..

together,

the hours seem like minutes..

apart, the minutes seem like days..

forever,

the seconds are endless..

and so are the many ways..

i ..am…loving...you


~asabi

If my vagina was a website it would be WIKIPEDIA!!!

Did you know...?

...that the Chicago Race Riot of 1919, which resulted in 38 deaths, 537 injuries and approximately 1,000 displaced, was the worst riot of the Red Summer of 1919?

Or…

…that influential makeup artist Pat McGrath takes between 30 and 50 bags of tools, materials, and reference books whenever she travels to fashion shows?

I didn’t either but you can learn about these random tidbits and more on Wikipedia. It’s not just a reference website but the monster of all encyclopedias.

Wikipedia is written collaboratively by volunteers from all around the world. Which means you, like me can edit almost any article or definition right on the website. You can also add information, cross-references or citations as you please. The downside is that this free encyclopedia has its share of errors and juvenile vandalism, which can be pretty funny. Sometimes, the writing is just plain indecipherable. But overall I think it’s a fabulously geeky idea.

The whole goal of Wikipedia, like my vagina is to make the world a better place through free content and a collaborative way of life. Live Free or Die!!!!

Is this thing on???

First let me introduce myself.... I’m a 30 something “wonderment” woman trying to balance the world in one hand and my blackberry in the other. After some gentle prodding from a friend (thanks, Ginger), I have decided to join the masses and write my own blog. And while I pride myself on usually being highly progressive in my participation of cutting-age societal advances some concepts take a little longer to fully grab my attention. Let’s take the DVD for example. I resisted buying one for years. Why should I? Do you know how long it took me to build up my VHS collection??? If it wasn’t for the fab-o gift I got from my girl Heather I might still be watching Love Jones on a VCR. But while I may be slow to change my ways I quickly make up for it with semi-obsessive acceptance. So as a proud card carrying Netflix member I am ready to dive into the next wave of modern technological self indulgence.

So why blog? I guess because I can. And that’s the wonderful thing about the world we live in. We can do mostly anything we want to do. So this will be a new outlet for my creative self-expression. I will be writing this for myself, for those who love me and those that will learn to love me. These will be random rants, observations, the occasional poem or picture and other nonsensical writings. And while I will be unapologetically honest I may change the names of the innocent and stupid. Feel free to leave a comment and call me on my shyt if you must.

So here’s to self-discovery, silliness and sundaes (with cherries on top!)

Namaste.